Special Forum: Come one, come all!! Random v. Todd

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jeff
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Special Forum: Come one, come all!! Random v. Todd

Post by jeff »

Tyler, I'd like to suggest that we have a thread dedicated to Random and Todd. It should be locked to everyone but them so that they can duke it out in an unmediated setting that would lead to unmitigated and explosive comments on both sides for the entertainment of us all.

We could even have a pay-per-view function. You could charge everyone $.25 to view each successive comment. They could get paid 10% of the take each for their banter and you and I would split the rest 50/30, 50 for you because you're Tyler and 30 in royalties to me because it was my idea. In fact, we could even have a running poll to see who is winning at any particular time! Savvy?

JG
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bscofield
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Post by bscofield »

so is this going to be like Wrestling ala WWF? Or will it be fake?


:lol:
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ToddJohnson
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Re: Special Forum: Come one, come all!! Random v. Todd

Post by ToddJohnson »

jeff wrote:Tyler, I'd like to suggest that we have a thread dedicated to Random and Todd. It should be locked to everyone but them so that they can duke it out in an unmediated setting that would lead to unmitigated and explosive comments on both sides for the entertainment of us all.

We could even have a pay-per-view function. You could charge everyone $.25 to view each successive comment. They could get paid 10% of the take each for their banter and you and I would split the rest 50/30, 50 for you because you're Tyler and 30 in royalties to me because it was my idea. In fact, we could even have a running poll to see who is winning at any particular time! Savvy?

JG
Hey now, I said "hugs and kisses" each time. Who ever said anything about an altercation? Besides, it's a perfectly plausible hypothesis that Random is Frank Burla. He's been around pipes for all those years, nobody would ever suspect him. We're not really sure where he lives or what he does when he's not planning for the Chicago pipe show. Wait a minute . . . maybe Random is Neil Flancebaum! Now there's a guy with some skeletons in his closet.

Todd

P.S. I will have no public dispute with Random. We will continue to trade cheap shots, as it is a long standing tradition dating at least as far back as when I was impugned by him for failing to use oil-based Minwax stains on my pipes, since stains are naturally designed to protect the wood.
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jeff
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Re: Special Forum: Come one, come all!! Random v. Todd

Post by jeff »

ToddJohnson wrote: Hey now, I said "hugs and kisses" each time. Who ever said anything about an altercation? Besides, it's a perfectly plausible hypothesis that Random is Frank Burla. He's been around pipes for all those years, nobody would ever suspect him. We're not really sure where he lives or what he does when he's not planning for the Chicago pipe show. Wait a minute . . . maybe Random is Neil Flancebaum! Now there's a guy with some skeletons in his closet.

Todd

P.S. I will have no public dispute with Random. We will continue to trade cheap shots, as it is a long standing tradition dating at least as far back as when I was impugned by him for failing to use oil-based Minwax stains on my pipes, since stains are naturally designed to protect the wood.
Hey, I'm just trying to capitalize on an already entertaining part of this forum! Don't take that away from me!! And if you do, I'll share your secrets. Like how your pipes smoke so well because you coat the bowls with your precious bacon fat, aspirin, and ground radial tire mixture. So, if you don't acquiesce, I'll systematically release more secrets until my scheme is realized! :twisted:

Jeff "The Shameless Capitalist" Gracik
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ToddJohnson
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Re: Special Forum: Come one, come all!! Random v. Todd

Post by ToddJohnson »

jeff wrote: Hey, I'm just trying to capitalize on an already entertaining part of this forum! Don't take that away from me!! And if you do, I'll share your secrets. Like how your pipes smoke so well because you coat the bowls with your precious bacon fat, aspirin, and ground radial tire mixture. So, if you don't acquiesce, I'll systematically release more secrets until my scheme is realized! :twisted:

Jeff "The Shameless Capitalist" Gracik
Please just don't tell them about the post-shaping arsenic bath that all my pipes undergo. That could be a real deal-breaker! Alright, I've got to get back to smelting more paint scraper handles. I have stems to cut.

Todd
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sagiter
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Post by sagiter »

How 'bout cutting my stem there chief :-))

Neil
Neil Flancbaum
www.smokinholsters.com
Home of the Ultimate Pipe Bag
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Tyler
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Post by Tyler »

Comedians one and all.

:roll: :roll:
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jeff
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Post by jeff »

Comedians one and all.

:roll: :roll:
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pipemaker
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Post by pipemaker »

I think that Todd and Random are twins who were seperated at birth. :D

Mike
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ArtGuy
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Post by ArtGuy »

random wrote:I think everyone who has posted in this assinine thread should kiss my behind where the brown comes out.
I just spit my coffee all over my desk LOL.
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bscofield
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Post by bscofield »

Where did this really start...? I'm no psychologist, heck I ain't even a good spellar, but I think that (regardless of what's said) there's a whole lot of passive agression in the posts. Sort of like *SMACK* -- 'haha, just kidding' or to quote Todd (cause his quote is readily available) 'hugs and kisses'

"Can't we all just get along?"

:P
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bscofield
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Post by bscofield »

oh... I thought it DID start here...

well... nevermind then! Feud away! :P
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jeff
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Post by jeff »

random wrote:I think everyone who has posted in this assinine thread should kiss my behind where the brown comes out.
:? ...

:roll:
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Nick
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Post by Nick »

Come 'round children, and I'll tell you how the trouble with Todd and Random really began....

HEY!! Not that close...darn smelly little brats!

Thats better.

Tyler! Quit pulling Ben's ponytail! NO!! DO NOT wrap it around your lathe spindle either.

YESH!

Well, long ago when the trout were still spawning in the Olentangy river, and the musk rats built elaborate condos in burnt out Chevy's there were two proud Indian clans: The Johnsonis and the Randomocoix.

These two people lived a prosperous and peacful exiistance along the banks of the pritine Cuyahoga river, collecting floating beer cans and hub caps and turning them into rare and equizitte...equisite...really nice jewelry. Well, Todd's great great great great grandfather Todd was the Johnsonis' clan pipe maker. He carved wonderful pipes out of native briar, found just south of I-71. The Chief of the tribe, Todd - an avid pipe smoker and the first American collector (NASPC member number 1), was really proud of his Todd Johnsonis pipes.

One day, while tracking a rare Saab 9000 sparkplug throug the forrest, he ran into the chief of the Randomocoix, Chief Phil (Short for Chief Philupyourpipewiththisandsmokeityabastad). Well Chief Todd was smoking an exceptionaly large Todd Johnsonis Sausge shape. He was a proud chief with that Sausage in his mouth. And he boasted to Chief Phil about the size of his Sausage.

Chief Phil was enraged. Stomping out of the Qwiki-mart and chasing down his tribe's current pipe maker, Bobahackinawayatdablock, and shooting him in the head with a deadly spitball. Needless to say, Phil was very remorsful about shooting Bob. So much so, that he decreed from that day, Bob's son Bobahackinawayatdablock Jr. would be the Trtibe's pipe carver.

Well, Bob Jr. wasn't your normal Randomocoix lad. No, he didn't walk in the same goloshes as the rest of the tribe. Not at all. Bob junior was a quiet kid, who thought that the meat should go inside the bread, and that anchovi's really do not belong on pizza. So it went without saying that Bob Jrs'. pipes were less than trabitional. But Bob believed in his work. He felt he was onto the track of the Styrophome Cup of life.

Needless to say, a great rivalry developed between Todd and Bob Jr. Bob Jr blamed Todd for the death of his father's pet squirell, Smellslikepoop. And Todd blamed Bob jr. for the shrinkage of his Sausage on summer harvest night with the lil hotty sqwa, Oohhohhbabyyes.

Well generations of Todd Johnsonis matched wits and briar against Bob Jr. But Bob Jr. seemed constant. And on a clear cold Vandialia evening, you can hear Bob Jr call out to his long dead squirell: "Ssssmmeelllslikpoooopp!!!"
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JMB
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Post by JMB »

lol Nick, you sure you were not born in Texas. Great story.
JB
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pipemaker
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Post by pipemaker »

Great piece Nick. LMAO

Mike
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Post by Tyler »

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I'm not sure what you just said Nick, but I think it is funny...(and makes about as much sense as the "real" feud.) :P

Tyler
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